Woman Says Husband Called Her Ugly and Wished for a Lighter-Skinned Mother of His Children

Marie Cherilien, an African-American woman, wrote in a Facebook post dated Sunday, October 4, 2026, that 85 percent of Black men carry internalized racism and favor women with lighter skin. Her post followed an incident in which her husband called her ugly and told her he wished he had selected a lighter-skinned woman to have his children. Cherilien said his harsh words left her stunned, but she did not respond as she once would have. She explained that she has grown to love herself and that she stopped being emotionally attached to her husband years ago. Even though their marriage lacks love, she said the couple shares three profitable businesses, two properties and three children. She urged dark-skinned women to carefully evaluate their partners for signs of internalized racism. In the post, she wrote that Black men favor lighter skin at a rate above 85 percent and that women with darker skin should vet a man whether or not he is a 'coon.' Cherilien recalled that she never understood why her husband used cruel names toward her. She said that on the day in question he called her ugly while she was holding their 4-year-old son. According to her post, he also said he could see why her mother had treated her badly and called her ugly when she was a child, told her no one wanted her, and said he wished he had chosen a lighter woman to serve as his children's mother. Although she was momentarily speechless, she remained quiet because she knows who she is and has accepted herself, she said. The version of her that existed before would have reacted, she added, but she is now in a period of healing and had outgrown her husband years earlier. She also shared that on a recent drive to school, her daughter remarked that the couple were merely business partners living in the same house and laughed. Cherilien said she was surprised her daughter had noticed. She described it as heartbreaking that her children do not see love in their parents' marriage.